Roman Reigns's Universal Championship was on the line in an "I Quit" Hell In A Cell Match against Jey Uso at 'WWE Hell In A Cell 2020'
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WWE Hell In A Cell 2020 had its work cut out for it.

The last couple Hell In A Cell events were, what’s the word, disasters. Bad finishes, no-finishes (in a cage match?!), and awful booking plagued the 2018 and 2019 Hell In A Cell shows.

With three of the titular cage matches scheduled for WWE Hell In A Cell 2020, WWE definiately upped the ante.

Both of the biggest titles in the company were on the line, and WWE’s biggest feud in years – Bayley vs. Sasha Banks – came to a violent conclusion in the cell.

Let’s jump off the cage, straight into our review for WWE Hell In A Cell 2020.

Jey Uso challenged Roman Reigns for the Universal Championship at 'WWE Hell In A Cell 2020'

WWE Universal Championship, “I Quit” Hell In A Cell – Roman Reigns (C, W/ Paul Heyman) Vs. Jey Uso

WWE Hell In A Cell 2020 opens with Roman Reigns still trying like hell to be an effective heel.

I mean, credit where it’s due. I’m taking him a little more seriously than I did back at SummerSlam. Sigh. We’re still going with the red cage? As long as it’s not coupled with a Fiend match, I guess. At least they learned that lesson last year.

Jey comes out wearing a traditional lei. Okay, at what point do Samoans cease to be in wrestling angles and start being in Fast And The Furious spinoffs? Apparently they’ve done such an awful job of building up this story, entrances and recap packages take up about 15 minutes’ worth of airtime before the bell even rings.

They circle each other and argue for six or seven hours. Exaggeration for comedic effect. They lock up, and Roman tosses Jey into the ropes only to shoulder tackle him on the rebound. A right from Roman puts Jey back on the mat.

The champion hits a snap suplex. Roman pummels Jey in the corners and then does about the only thing he’s good at. He stalls while Jey pulls himself up. This is WWE Hell In A Cell 2020, not your intro course at Lucky McFinster’s Wrestling School!

Jey fights back, punching Roman to the outside. He hits a TOPE SUICIDA (copyright Excalibur), sending Roman into the cage. Back inside, Jey hits a running clothesline that sends Roman over the top followed by another tope.

The challenger throws Roman back inside. Oh, by the way. The stipulation here is that if Jey loses, he becomes an indentured servant. Yeah. If Jey loses he becomes Roman’s slave. So basically, Roman draws on Skeletor and General Zod as his role models for evil schemes.

Anyway. No sooner than they get back inside, Roman hits a Spear. Then he taunts him for eighteen months on the ground before they do anything. This is boring.

Roman gets a chair from under the ring, but Jey pops up and hits a dropkick through the ropes. He goes for another, but Roman counters with an elbow to the face. The champion follows with another Spear, but Jey refuses to quit.

Reigns goes for a third spear, but Jey counters and hits a superkick followed by the frog splash. Roman won’t quit, so Jey hits another one. Because there’s no real crowd noise, we now have to listen to wrestlers act mid-match. The ref asks Roman if he wants to quit. Roman answers, “The head of the table never quits!”

Jey pulls a leather strap from under the ring. Because that’s a logical storage place. The challenger goes to town on Roman’s back with the strap. Roman finally hits the third Spear. Jey won’t quit. Now Roman has the strap, and he starts whipping Jey with it.

Roman ties one end of the strap to Jey’s wrist and continues whipping with the other end. Jey, to his credit, sells all of this like he’s in a mafia movie torture scene. Roman tries to drag Jey to him, but Jey charges with a running forearm. It devolves into a slugfest. Jey kicks Roman into the ropes.

The champion goes for the Superman punch, but Jey pulls him down. Now Jey tries to wrap the strap around Roman’s head and pulls backward, choking the Universal Champion. Roman passes out for half a second. Jey lets go, but Roman pops back up, prompting the challenger to wrap him up again.

The champion passes out a second time. Because Jey’s an idiot, he lets him go. Roman is just awake enough to shake his head to indicate he won’t quit. Jey picks up the chair and rushes the champion, but Roman counters with the Superman punch and cinches in the Guillotine. This is exceedingly boring.

Hopefully not a sign of things to come at WWE Hell In A Cell 2020. Anyway. Roman releases the hold, but Jey won’t quit. He starts yammering about acknowledging him, Tribal Chief, blah blah blah. I swear, two thirds of this has been one person waiting for another person to stand up.

Roman drags Jey to the apron and hits the Drive-By. Jey won’t quit. The referee teases that he’s out, so Roman starts punching him awake. Roman grabs the ringsteps and props them against Jey’s head. He kicks the stairs into Jey’s head on another Drive-By. Jey is out, which means he can’t say “I quit.”

The referee tries to call it, so Roman throws the referee out of the ring. Another referee comes inside, opening the door to tend to him. Roman tires to throw the steps inside, as officials and referees try to tend to Jey. The steps fall back in his face. BOTCHAMANIA, BROTHER!

Roman clears the ring and pins Jey down with the steps. And taunts him. Jimmy runs in to shield Jey. Again. Roman tears up as Jimmy appeals to his heart or something. This is absolutely awful. Jimmy gets Roman to shake his hand, so Roman locks him in the Guillotine.

He grabs on to Jey, who quits to save Jimmy.

This was absolute trash. That wasn’t a match so much as it was four or five SmackDown segments strung together.

After the match, the Wild Samoans crown Roman Reigns the head of the table. Good, now can we end this stupidity for a few months?

Winner (And STILL Champion): Roman Reigns

Match Rating:  -**

'WWE Hell In A Cell 2020' saw Jeff Hardy take on Elias

Jeff Hardy Vs. Elias

No, seriously. This is a PPV match. In 2020. On WWE Hell In A Cell 2020.

And wasn’t Jeff Hardy just fighting for the Intercontinental Championship a couple months ago? Was it even that long ago? No, it was barely a month ago.

They lock up, and Elias forces Jeff into the corner. Another lock-up, and the referee breaks it up at five. Elias lays in the beatdown with a couple forearms followed by some chops. Jeff fights back and hits an Atomic Drop followed by a necksnap for two.

An armwrench follows, as Jeff lays in some forearms. Elias counters with a snapmare into a headlock, but Jeff counters into a reverse armlock. Still locked up, Elias drags Jeff and tosses him through the ropes and to the floor.

Elias gives chase, and they take turns slamming each other into the barricade. Back inside, Elias rolls out, but Jeff hits a baseball slide kick under the ropes. He leaps off the steps at Elias, but Elias dodges and Jeff crashes ribs-first into the barricade.

Jeff beats the 10-count at the last second, but Elias is waiting for him. Elias makes with the beatdown. He whips Jeff into the corner and hits a clothesline, but it only gets two. Rest hold time, because Jeff is 147 years old. Elias cinches in a side headlock, but Jeff fights to his feet.

Hardy gets an enziguri, and both guys are down at WWE Hell In A Cell 2020. Jeff comes off the ropes and hits an Atomic Drop into a standing senton for two. He goes for the Twist of Fate, but Elias counters and nearly botches a powerbomb for two. That could’ve been bad.

Jeff hits Whisper in the Wind, but it only gets two. He hits the Twist of Fate and heads to the top. Elias tries to sneak out, so Jeff teases the swanton on the apron. But Elias drops to the floor.

Elias goes for his guitar, but Jeff intercepts and hits him over the back with it for the DQ. Lame.

Winner (By Disqualification):  Elias

Match Rating:  * 1/2

Otis put his Money In The Bank contract on the line against the Miz at 'WWE Hell In A Cell 2020'

Miz (W/ John Morrison) Vs. Otis (W/ Tucker) – Winner Gets Otis’s MITB Contract

Before the match, we get a recap of the Law & Otis segment from SmackDown. Does Vince think that Law & Order  and The Peoples’ Court are the same thing?

Otis beats Miz down to start and shoulder-tackles him in the corner. He hits a bodyslam on Miz for two. Miz goes for the Skull-Crushing Finale, but Otis dodges. The Miz tries to pull Otis down, so Otis stands on his chest and drops full-weight on it.

Miz suckers Otis in and tosses him through the ropes. He tries to attack through the ropes, but Otis intercepts him and beats him down outside the ring. Otis bashes Miz’s head into the announce desk a couple times before tossing him back inside.

Morrison gets on the apron for a distraction, allowing Miz to hit a DDT for two. Are we really defending the Money In The Bank contract at WWE Hell In A Cell 2020? This is dumb.

As Otis gets to his feet, Morrison hits a cheap shot from the outside, allowing Miz to take over. Miz hits a dropkick for two. Now Miz cinches in a sleeper hold. Michael Cole suggests Otis is susceptible because he probably has sleep apnea. For those keeping score, that means Vince McMahon is feeding fat jokes over the head set.

Otis breaks free and Hulks up. He hits Miz with a couple of shoulder tackles. Miz tries to counter with one of his own and falls like he was tackling a brick wall. An inverted suplex from Otis is next, followed by a splash in the corner.

He goes for the Caterpillar, but Morrison drags Miz out of the ring. Otis gives chase. Back inside, Miz stuns Otis with a kick. Morrison tries to hit Otis with the briefcase, but the referee catches him and ejects him from ringside.

Miz objects, and Otis rolls him up for two. Otis hits a discus clothesline for two. Miz clings to the apron to keep Otis from dragging him to the center, but Otis keeps pulling. But as Otis gets close to the apron, Tucker clocks Otis with the briefcase.

The Miz gets the pin and wins the Money In The Bank briefcase.

Okay, Vince? If you weren’t sold on Otis as Mr. MITB? You shouldn’t have booked it. Idiot. Honestly, they killed the guy’s character when they split him up from Mandy.

This was just extra dirt on the casket.

Backstage, Tucker gives his reasons (I did all the work, I made Otis a star, blah blah blah), and Otis jumps him. Weak.

Winner (And NEW Mr. Money In The Bank): The Miz

Match Rating:  **

Sasha Banks challenged for the SmackDown Women's Championship against Bayley at 'WWE Hell In A Cell 2020'

SmackDown Women’s Championship, Hell In A Cell – Bayley (C) Vs. Sasha Banks

I still feel like they could’ve easily carried this forward to WrestleMania. But here we are at WWE Hell In A Cell 2020. Capping off the feud in an HIAC match just because this is the time of the year we do them.

These two have been money together for half a decade. Please, let this match save this dreadful show.

Bayley carries a chair to the ring with her, but Sasha kicks it out of her hand and into the aisle as the cage lowers. The bell rings, and Bayley tries to bail to the outside, but Sasha takes her down immediately.

Sasha punches Bayley’s skull to mush before kicking her down in the corner. The Boss goes for a splash, but Bayley catches her only to fall into the Bank Statement. Bayley bites Sasha to free herself and rolls to the outside. Sasha comes off the ropes and goes for a baseball slide, but Bayley dodges.

She drives Sasha into the beams of the cell. Bayley grabs a kendo stick from under the ring and swings like crazy at Sasha. Sasha dodges and grabs the stick, but she throws it through the fence of the cage. Bayley gets another stick, but Sasha catches it again and kicks Bayley hard in the kidney. Ouch.

The challenger tosses the kendo stick in the ring and pulls out a table. But Bayley pops up and finishes setting it up. Too bad for Bayley, then, that Sasha wakes up and uses the table to push Bayley into the cell, followed by a meteora. Sasha goes up top and hits another meteora for two. That was awesome.

Banks tosses a couple chairs into the ring. She swings at Bayley, but Bayley rolls her up for two. Sasha rushes her in the corner, but Bayley tosses her onto the floor. Now Bayley has the chair. Sasha is helpless, draped across the table.

Bayley runs at her with the chair, but Sasha dodges, kicking the table into Bayley’s face followed by a leaping knee, driving Bayley into the cell. She throws Bayley back inside. Bayley escapes to the apron and hits a stungun, putting Sasha’s throat across the middle rope.

The champion throws the chair back inside. She throws Sasha off the apron onto the cell, but Sasha hangs onto the mesh before hitting a standing rana, sending Bayley into the cell.

Okay, so this kicks WWE Hell In A Cell 2020 up a few notches. Sasha drives Bayley head first into the steel steps. She props a couple of kendo sticks between the mesh and the steps. She rushes Bayley, but the champ gets a drop toe-hold, sending Sasha face-first into the steps and the sticks.

Bayley sets the sticks back up and catapults her throat-first into the sticks. Yeesh. The champ sends Sasha back inside and goes for the cover. But it only gets two. Bayley starts hammering at Sasha’s injured neck, but Sasha gets a sunset flip into a powerbomb, sending Bayley crashing into the cell.

Is this a TakeOver show?

Sasha rushes back inside for the cover, but Bayley kicks out. The challenger props up a chair and tries to choke Bayley with it. But Bayley reverses and sends Sasha face-first into the chair.

The challenger props a chair over Bayley’s face in the corner and goes for a bronco buster. Bayley dodges and hits her own sunset flip into a powerbomb. And Sasha’s skull just bounces off the chair. Sasha kicks out at two.

Bayley goes up top and hits the Macho Man elbow for two. Sasha hits a backstabber into the Bank Statement. Bayley climbs under the ropes to escape and ties Sasha up in the apron and kicks her head into the steel ring frame.

Now Bayley wails on her with the kendo stick. She heads back under the ring and pulls out a rope and a roll of duct tape. I mean, if this were a different kind of show. Anyway. She tapes two kendo sticks together.

Back in the ring, Bayley tries to drag Sasha into the ring. But Sasha sprays Bayley in the face with a fire extinguisher. She manages to drag the chair she used to turn on Sasha through a crack in the door. But Sasha intercepts and throws it into the ring.

She chucks Bayley from one side of the cage into the other. Sasha hits another meteora, bouncing Bayley’s head off the cage. The challenger throws Bayley inside and grabs another kendo stick. She wails on the champion with it.

Bayley crawls for her lucky chair, but Sasha kicks her down. Sasha goes up top for the Eddie Guererro frog splash, but Bayley gets the chair up at the last minute. Both women are down.

This match is a pro wrestling master class. What Roman needed scripted dialogue for earlier, Sasha says with her eyes and her facial expressions. “I can’t believe it’s come to this.”

The champion plants Sasha’s face into the ground on the outside. Back inside, Bayley covers Sasha, but it only gets two. She throws Sasha back outside and grabs a ladder. Bayley takes two chairs and makes a ladder bridge.

Sasha crawls back inside. She leaps at Bayley, but Bayley catches her and plants her face-first onto the ladder. The champion lays Sasha prone on the ladder. She goes up top and tries the elbow with the chair, but Bayley dodges.

The challenger hits a meteora on the ladder followed by a Bayley-to-Belly on the ladder. Bayley kicks out. Sasha gets to her feet first. She goes for a backbreaker, but Bayley counters and hits Bayley-to-Belly for two.

Bayley has the chair again, and she wails on the challenger. She goes for a Bayley-to-Belly with the chair, but Sasha reverses and locks in the Bank Statement using the chair as leverage. The champion taps out, and Sasha is the new SmackDown Women’s Champion!

This match was everything. Thankfully, something is going to come out of WWE Hell In A Cell 2020 on a high note.

Winner (And NEW Champion): Sasha Banks

Match Rating:  *****

United States Championship – Bobby Lashley (C) Vs. Slapjack

For some reason, WWE thought WWE Hell In A Cell 2020 wasn’t quite long and excruciating enough.

Mustafa Ali and Retribution laid out a challenge on the kickoff show. Any member of the Hurt Business vs. any member of Retribution. Lashley volunteers to put his U.S. title on the line.

So Retribution sends out – wait – Slapjack? Um. Okay.

Slapjack comes out swinging. But Lashley immediately beats him down in the corner. He hits a shoulder tackle in the corner before chucking Slapjack into the opposite corner. The beatdown continues.

Lashley throws Slapjack around a couple more times. He hits the not-quite-Jackhammer before going back to the corner. Squash matches are what PPV is all about, after all. Slapjack tries to mount an offense with a dropkick that missed by about six or seven miles.

Now Slapjack is laying in stomps in the corner followed by a cannonball. He tries to cinch in a headlock on the champion but Lashley reverses only to eat a DDT for two.

Slapjack heads up top, but Lashley intercepts and chucks him down to the mat. Lashley hits a belly-to-belly throw followed by the Almighty Spinebuster. The champion cinches in the Hurt Lock for the submission to retain.

Msutafa Ali and the rest of Retribution run in and beat down Lashley. The Hurt Business comes out to even the odds, and we have a match set up for Survivor Series.

Well, realistically its kickoff show.

This was fine, but it was a waste of time.

Winner (And STILL Champion): Bobby Lashley

Match Rating:  **

Drew McIntyre put the WWE Championship on the line against Randy Orton at 'WWE Hell In A Cell 2020'

WWE Championship, Hell In A Cell – Drew McIntyre (C) Vs. Randy Orton

Okay, these guys have put on some solid matches during their feud. But this needs to be it.

After WWE Hell In A Cell 2020, no more Orton vs. McIntyre, please.

McIntyre comes out first, but a disguised Orton jumps him from behind. Drew takes an early advantage, but Orton fights back. He slams McIntyre into the cage before clearing off the announcer’s table.

Orton goes for a suplex, but McIntyre blocks it. He drags Orton back toward the door, but Orton continues to fend him off. McIntyre finally gets Orton through the door and into the ring. And both guys are basically starting on equal footing.

Well, that was pointless.

They slug it out to start. McIntyre chops Orton in the corner. Orton goes for the RKO, but Orton dumps him to the outside. McIntyre rakes Orton’s face into the cage. The champion throws Orton back inside and covers for two.

They fight to the outside again, and McIntyre maintains the beatdown. McIntyre gets a chair and wallops Orton over the back with it. He tosses Orton into the cage again. Now the champion picks up the ring steps and bounces Orton’s face off of them.

McIntyre throws the stairs at Orton, but the challenger evades and rolls into the ring. The champion follows inside and calls for the Claymore, but Orton grabs the chair and takes out McIntyre’s knee. Another swing to McIntyre’s back puts him down.

Orton presses the chair into McIntyre’s injured jaw. The announcers cover the night when Orton kicked in McIntyre’s skull three times. Hey, I remember Keith Lee.

The challenger does the ol’ catapult throat-first into the bottom rope. Orton stomps McIntyre’s jaw into the steps on the outside. The challenger rakes McIntyre’s face into the cage and trash talks for a little bit.

McIntyre mounts a mini-comeback, but Orton gets a thumb to the champ’s eye. He whips McIntyre into the steel steps before setting up a table.

The champion crawls into the ring to recover. Orton follows and hits a backbreaker for two. They slug it out. McIntyre its a series of clotheslines followed by a series of belly-to-belly throws. He goes for the Future Shock followed by a neckbreaker.

McIntyre picks up Orton, but Orton slips out and the fight goes back to the outside. The champion hits a belly-to-belly into the table. Both guys are down on the outside.

Drew wastes some time before throwing Orton back inside. Orton hits a Greco-Roman nutshot to put the champion down. The challenger hits the draping DDT for one.

Orton heads to the outside and gets a pair of bolt-cutters to escape the cage. They brawl up and down the entrance ramp. Orton climbs to the top of the cell, and McIntyre gives chase. Both guys brawl for a bit, and Orton decides he’s had enough.

He tries to climb back down the cage. Again, McIntyre follows. They exchange blows, hanging off the cage. Orton eventually knocks McIntyre off, sending him crashing through the announce table.

McIntyre finally makes his way into the cage, where Orton goes for an RKO. The champion counters with a backslide. He hits a Claymore, but it only gets a two-count. McIntyre goes for another, but Orton counters with the RKO for the pin and the title.

Pretty standard brawl, but it was fun enough. It’s pretty sad we’ve gotten to a point where you can have a “standard” Hell In A Cell match. Kudos to McIntyre for a six-month run with the title.

Here’s hoping they have plans for him beyond WWE Hell In A Cell 2020, but history tells me not so much. Again, Keith Lee.

Winner (And NEW Champion): Randy Orton

Match Rating:  *** 1/4

The Breakdown

WWE Hell In A Cell 2020 was hot garbage. I’m insufferably tired of WWE pay-per-view shows.

Honestly, if nobody was reading these, I wouldn’t do them anymore.

In case things are ambiguous, this show is an easy thumbs-down. I just – I hated it.

Sasha vs. Bayley was an absolute classic. McIntyre vs. Orton was pretty good, but WWE Hell In A Cell 2020 was a one-match show.

But that’s not enough to save it.

All images courtesy of WWE.

'WWE Hell In A Cell 2020'

4.2

In-Ring Action

4.3/10

Booking

3.9/10

Storytelling

4.2/10

Entertainment Value

4.4/10

Pros

  • Sasha Vs. Bayley. Simply amazing.
  • Decent main event between Orton and McIntyre

Cons

  • Roman Reigns and Jey Uso put on the most boring HIAC match ever.
  • This stuff with Miz, Otis, and Tucker makes no sense
  • Hardy vs. Elias had no business on PPV
  • Soap opera trash with Reigns and the Usos absolutely killed this show off the jump
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