Destroy All Humans! Remake is finally here, and fans should be excited. Developed by Pandemic Studios and published by THQNordic, Destroy All Humans! for the PlayStation 4 and Xbox One puts players in control of Crypto-137, a proud soldier of the Furon Empire, as he attempts to save his race by conquering Earth, to find pure strands of Furon DNA hidden in the brain stems of humans.
Upon starting the invasion, players are greeted with a message stating that this is a historical recreation of the Furon invasion, with only a graphical update. Destroy All Humans! is an exact copy of the initial game’s release from 2005. Meaning it comes with the stiff controls and questionable writing. And personally, I think that adds some charm to the experience.
The entire experience is full of semi-dated pop culture references and plenty of stereotypes about our little green invaders. The age doesn’t take away from the experience. But usually the jokes and references fall flat.
No domination would be complete without an arsenal to wreak havoc. Crypto has access to numerous weapons and skills to take over the United States. He has the ability to assume a holographic identity of a human to access hidden or restricted areas without letting everyone know about the little grey threat. Crypto can also read the thoughts of random citizens to gain insight on Earth as a whole.
Players also have access to some pretty exciting weapons such as a disintegrator. Think the weapons from the aliens from Mars Attacks. And of course, what alien invasion would be complete without a proper anal probe? Don’t answer that. The weapons are fun, but none of them truly stand out as superior. Each of the weapons are good fun and are a nuisance, but nothing feels strong enough to bring to a firefight.
In the free roam levels this isn’t an issue, but during some missions it becomes a mad dash to find any foothold. At no point did I feel all-powerful, and I often felt strong enough to just pass through.
Destroy All Humans! follows a basic set-up. There are 23 missions, each increasing in difficulty, and each mission ranges from destroying a local fair after stealing the beauty queen to infiltrating a military base to talk to a reluctant television host. The missions are fun and humorous and are incredibly short.
Each mission feels just long enough to be satisfying and never teeters on becoming too much. There are several locations players can conquer. And after clearing a certain number of missions, challenges will open up such as timed races, abduction challenges, and creating carnage.
With Destroy All Humans! being an exact remake, there are a few things that work against it. First, the difficulty spike bundled with outdated game controls and feel. The game is relatively easy, but near the end it felt like the games mechanics fought against me. There were several moments where I was surrounded by enemies, but none of the weapons felt useful enough to take care of what’s going on.
The biggest struggle I had was with the shield mechanic. It either felt like the shield wasn’t strong enough or it took so long for it to refill that it became a hindrance. This became more and more apparent with the last few boss fights. Most boss fights boil down to a bullet sponge with some stuff you have to dodge. But there were a few occasions in which boss damage felt way too high, and it took too long to get my shields back so the fight became a struggle to down the boss as fast as possible.
The second buzzkill is that the game is about ten hours long. I beat the main story in about 7 hours, and felt no drive to go back and clear the remaining challenges. But honestly, I just wanted to play more. Sure, the game has some issues, but I just want to goof around. My hope is that THQNordic will see this as a push to remaster Destroy All Humans! 2 or even create a new entry for the series.
Destroy All Humans! feels like it’s ripped straight from 2005, and that’s not a bad thing. I wish some minor tweaks were made to bring the game feel and some mechanics to 2020, but overall it’s a fun and nonsensical adventure.
I do have some difficulty recommending this game due to its price tag. Destroy All Humans! retails for $39.99 and if this is someone’s first exposure to the series, then the stiff controls, awkward writing, and extremely short game time make it hard to recommend.
If you’re like me and have some nostalgia for the title, the price might be worth it. Destroy All Humans! was one of the first games I ever completed and bought with my own money. I love the series and want nothing more than to get a new entry or remaster of the second entry. Regardless, if you’re ready to invade the United States then I recommend picking up Destroy all Humans!
Destroy All Humans! was purchased by the reviewer and for review purposes. All images taken in game